The scab was torn off a wound that was well on its way to being healed. The wound … a deep, re-opened mess. And I was bleeding. Badly.
For two years I’ve grieved. Processed. Talked it through with God. Talked things through with my best friend. Surrendered. Dripped mascara stained tears onto the pages of my precious Bible. Forgave. Laid on my face before God. Processed some more. Dripped more mascara stained tears. Then forgave … again. Grieved some more. Lamented. Surrendered again. Let go. A process that would be repeated over and over … and over again.
It’s the Shelly Brown process of healing. 🙂
But it works.
Yet now, here I sit, working again trying to stop the bleeding.
I realized this week how vulnerable we are to the enemy (the father of lies), when we feel so deeply wounded. We are so busy tending to the bleeding, that our minds become a raging battlefield. The energies we so diligently used to guard our hearts and minds are now diverted to simply keeping our head above water, while we nurse the hurt and replay over and over in our mind, the scenes that brought us back to this painful place.
My healing won’t take as long this time, as this was merely a set back. The enemies’ fiery darts hit some vulnerable and exposed areas of my heart and mind. But, he didn’t win! I’ll do what I’ve done over the last couple of years …
Process. Pour out my heart to God. Cry. Grieve. Talk it through with my godly best friend. Saturate my mind with Truth from God’s Word. Surrender. Let go. And forgive. Then … repeat, over and over … and over again, until the only evidence there was ever a painful wound is the scar, a beautiful scar. My beautiful reminder of how there is nothing too broken for God’s healing power.
Dig deeper: Proverbs 4:23 tells us to guard our hearts (minds) with all diligence because out of our hearts flows all the issues of life. 2 Corinthians 10:3-6 offers a very simple blueprint for guarding our hearts and minds.